Do you just want a casual companion, or are you seeking commitment and marriage? Ask him what he believes, how it informs his life and whether he would be willing to marry or commit to a non-Jew.If you're having fun with your man and don't want a lifelong commitment, you might not need to get deeper into his beliefs. Ask how he expects his family and community to respond to you.” they are italicizing the questions that all of us who believe in long-term romantic unions ask, every day of our conjoined lives: When is a sacrifice worth making, and when is it too much?What do I really care about, and what is just my stubborn ego? And what do I owe to my religious community, which may need me as much as I need it?
At least they have a fixed star, in the pope and the Vatican, to ground their arguments and measure the depths of their dissent. Let’s say you are committed to marrying within the faith, and at some point, against what feel like impossible odds, given our tiny numbers, you find a fellow Jew whom you wish to marry. One of you never wants to go to synagogue, while the other would never miss it on Rosh Hashana.After college he rejected evangelicalism and became an Episcopalian, then 20 years later a Roman Catholic.Woll and Sweeney, who in 2013 co-authored , are thus seekers, finely attuned to the evolution of religious commitments.So actual interfaith marriages, the kind we think about when we think about intermarriage, are important because they throw into relief the problems inherent to all romantic unions.When, say, a Roman Catholic marries a Jew and together they embark on the journey of “How do we make last for 50 years?This conversation doesn't necessarily have to determine how you would bring up your children, whether you would convert or other serious issues, but you want an idea of what Judaism means to his life -- and what you mean to him. You might have to get a little creative, but chances are you agree with many of Judaism's tenets, even as a non-Jew.